Thom Forbes

Pineapple — Ananas Comosus. Chock full of Vitamin C, Manganese and Bromelain. High in anti-oxidants and a natural anti-inflammatory. Sure, it's a delicious fruit, but to us "Cronies," it means so much more....

In "Card Speak," Pineapple is a slight variation of Texas Hold-em. Bear in mind, a thorough understanding of the game, Texas Hold-em, is required in order to participate in a game of Pineapple. Pineapple is not for the squeamish. (BTW just how lame/out of touch are "Our Fakatka Games," where the most purest of card games, HOLD-EM, doesn't even merit a shout out?) [Editor's note: Here's a Shout Out to HOLD-EM; HOLD-EM also may be included in the forthcoming "Our Real Pure Games" section, possibly as the single entry].

Rules, here we go: The seven-card game is played high only, or high/low, depends on the dealer. No wild cards. Everyone is dealt three cards, face down. A round of betting/sniveling ensues. Dealer then flops three up community cards, all players must now discard one of their three cards. A second round of betting/sniveling takes place. At this point, the game is now played just like Hold-em. Two additional community cards are flopped, with the requisite betting/sniveling after each card. With two down cards and five community cards the player makes his best five card high and/or low hand. The players with the best high and low hands split the pot. Done. Game over. 

All that is left, besides the outpouring of woulda, coulda, shouda's, is raking in the chips!!—Jason Roif